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Shands ✭✭

Just feel I need to ‘talk, to someone today. Just feeling very low. It’s chemo week again - so pre-chemo bloods yesterday, oncologist this morning, CT tomorrow ( Because they know there is spread to lymph nodes in axilla and neck from my breast cancer, so checking for any further spread), then 2nd chemo Thursday. I am disabled and a wheelchair user. I do usually manage to use crutches in the house but since op ( Mastectomy & Axillary clearance of lymph nodes have not been allowed to use them so missing my mobility however limited it usually is). Hopefully get that back soon. My stomach is black and very sore from the Fragmin injections ( I’m usually on oral anticoagulants but have had to change whilst on chemo). I’m on higher dose Fragmin as had DVTs when on the normal preventative dose in the past. I’ve now lost all my hair which is hard - I couldn’t have the cold cap due to having severe migraines and Raynauds, but it caught me out a bit being so soon ( 2 weeks after 1st chemo). Have got some hats/scarves but struggling with getting them right. Also got a wig which I had before I lost my hair so colour is good match and I was quite pleased with it. I even had a few nice comments from friends and my son who saw photos. Then - I showed my Mum a photo of me wearing it and she said ‘what’s wrong with your face? You look all wrong and somethings not right!’ . Trying to get back to feeling good about it I showed another friend who just laughed. Now my wig’s sat upstairs and I’m too scared to wear it. Sorry for all the moans - think everything’s just hit me and as I was so ill after the 1st chemo am dreading this one but trying to look positive and think that will be 2 down 4 to go so a third of the way through by Friday but admit I’m finding it hard. Really hope you are all doing as well as poss at the moment. Thank you to anyone who has read this - I’m on my own today which I’m finding hard so very grateful for this forum, but tomorrows another day so onwards and upwards I hope. X

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Shands
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  • (Quote) Thank you so much for such kind words and beautiful photo. It is good to speak to people who truly understand. Xx
    in Flowers Comment by Shands March 1
  • (Quote) Thank you all for your advice and pics of beautiful flowers. From what I can gather think it should be safer now chemo is over, as was told definitely no flowers then. Already got some beautiful tulips on the mantelpiece! I did have some I c…
    in Flowers Comment by Shands February 28
  • (Quote) Oops meant similar to Cavapoo X
  • (Quote) She’ll forgive you. To be fair she normally just gets called ‘Scruff’. Whatever you do she just always looks like our ‘Tatty Teddy’. She’s actually a Cavachon but very similar to the Cavachon. She gets called a ‘Minichon’ as she’s only just …
  • (Quote) You’re so right. Cassie does agility and absolutely loves it. I’m a wheelchair user so my husband runs her but the couple of shows we did leading up to my diagnosis were a disaster! As soon as Mark took Cassie’s lead off she ran back to me, …
  • (Image) My gorgeous Cavachon Cassie. She has been a constant support since my diagnosis 8 months ago and my husband, Mark, says he knows what sort of day I’ve had when he comes in from work by her actions. She’s always been a ‘Daddy’s pup’ - runni…
  • Countryside
  • Hi Rob, Good to hear from you. 2nd Chemo caused less actual sickness ( oncologist added in a fourth antisickness drug) but nausea has been awful. 1st 10 days could hardly eat anything and even drinking was hard then started to eat more but want to e…
  • Thank you Rob. It certainly does help to be in touch with others who truly understand. The course you are on with Macmillan sounds amazing and I look forward to hearing about it as, like you say, many of us would certainly benefit from it I’m sure. …
  • I think all the above messages are so true.I used to be a nurse and it was so true then that men did not want to show their feelings. They were always ‘fine’ when asked and only occasionally showed how much things were really affecting them. If I ha…
  • Thank you Rob x
  • Hi Rob, Thanks for message. First chemo harder than I thought - extremely sick and only really picked up at all after a week but now enjoying a bit of time before my next one on the 31st. I’d been told the first session wouldn't affect me much with …
  • Thank you to all that have replied or just written about their experiences throughout treatment. I have heard today that I will have my pre-chemo appointment, bloods etc next Tues (8th) and , if all okay, will start chemo the following day. Hopefull…
  • Thank you, yes I’m very lucky to have a very supportive husband, and his work are just being amazing with time off he needs for appointments etc. Just read that if you get severe migraines the Cold Cap probably isn’t an option so may have had my dec…
  • Thank you Lou, Just in the first day of being in the forum it is so good to ‘chat’ with people who really do understand. I feel sure I will get a lot of support from here over the coming weeks and months. Sue xx
  • Thanks Barbara, Really good to hear from someone who understands. Yes , my brother said ‘it’s only hair’, along with ‘don’t bother with stupid wigs either’ & ‘both pointless, just put a hat on’, none of which were remotely understanding or help…
  • Thank you Rob. Yes hopefully the CT wont throw up any nasty surprises. I look forward to hearing from others who are going through / have completed their cancer treatment. Thank you, Sue
  • I have just had my first appointment with the oncologist today, having had a mastectomy and full axiliary node clearance 4 weeks ago. I see the nurses for my pre-chemo check next week and probably start chemo the week after, followed by radiotherapy…