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Anal cancer.

Charlie91Charlie91 Posts: 4

I am almost 5 yrs cancer free. Will i ever get over feeling the shame of it. Mine was not from too many sexual partners. The drs made me feel terrible. Since then i have a horrible time discussing this. Will i ever get over feeling this way? Mine was stage 2.

Also some of the side effects of the radiation and chemo are still with me. Because i dont look ill, i get alot of guilt abiut not feeling well.

Suggestions?

Marie

Comments

  • Charlie91Charlie91 Posts: 4

    Ps i am glad i found this site. Marie

  • SunshinedaffSunshinedaff Posts: 1,337 ✭✭✭✭✭

    @Charlie91

    Hi Marie,

    So lovely to 'meet' you, thank you so much for sharing a little about yourself.

    I think it is fantastic that you are 5 years clear, that is always something to celebrate.

    I am so sorry that you feel such shame about having had this type of cancer, even worse that dr's have contributed to this.

    May I say, there is no shame to be had, cancer is no respecter of persons, it attacks at random, towards anyone, and with other cancers there are usually several other factors that can be the cause, sometimes, a 'reason' may not even be found.

    The long term effects from chemo and radiotherapy go on for a long time, I am not surprised you are still experiencing some of them. I am almost 3 years from treatment for breast cancer, and I still have issues from the treatment.

    Have you considered contacting someone like Macmillans who may be able to give you some support?

    You are very welcome here, I hope you will feel comfortable to be able to chat about anything. Everyone here is very friendly, even if the cancer is different, many of the other aspects of cancer are very similar. You will find a lot of understanding here.

    Chat soon,

    Lou x

  • jacksprat_x1jacksprat_x1 Posts: 317 ✭✭✭✭

    @Charlie91 @Sunshinedaff

    Welcome to the site Marie, I am so sorry the Doctors made you feel that way. That’s not fair. As Lou said cancer is no respector of persons. The cause may never be known. It’s wonderful that you are 5 years clear! I dream of that day!

    This site and the wonderful people on it give you such support. If you need to vent you are at the right place.

    My advice would be kind to yourself. It works for me when the blame game starts! 😂

    Look after yourself you are not to blame.

    Have a lovely restful night. Keep in touch.

    Lv Jackie x

  • Charlie91Charlie91 Posts: 4

    Thank vou very much.

  • Charlie91Charlie91 Posts: 4

    Sunshinedaff,

    Thank you very much. I willresearch Macmillans as i dont know who they are.

    Everyone here is so kind. I wish i had found this site sooner.

    Thanks so mucu

  • SunshinedaffSunshinedaff Posts: 1,337 ✭✭✭✭✭

    @Charlie91

    Good morning Marie,

    I do apologise, I should have mentioned Macmillan Cancer Support are a charity organisation that offer support to cancer patients and their families. They are a UK based organisation. If you are in the UK, there will hopefully be one in your local area.

    If you are not UK based, perhaps there is something similar where you are.

    Yes, this is a good place, more people are joining and chatting too. I hope you had a good night, and have a good day today.

    Lou x

  • RobertARobertA Posts: 1,240 mod

    @charlie

    Hi Marie

    So pleased you found our Community. Reaching out to others is a great coping strategy and the lovely people on this site are very supportive. I agree wholeheartedly with all the comments made by @Sunshinedaff and @jacksprat_x1.

    I firmly believe that a cancer diagnosis is not the same as that of any other type of illness. Sometimes the emotional reaction comes afterwards and it is not surprising that you are dealing with lingering physical and emotional effects. I feel very angry and frustrated to hear that your doctors were so judgemental and without any reason or justification to be that way. It is quite unacceptable that the very people who are responsible for your health and welfare should have caused you such distress.

    As Jackie and Lou said, if you have a MacMillan near you, it is worth popping in and having a chat. Please consider doing so. They are very helpful and supportive and usually have access to a counsellor who can be a great help to cancer survivors. I have had problems with cancer related depression and with the support of the Counsellor and friends in this Community I have been able to find a way through the fog. I am now involved with MacMillan as a volunteer myself.

    I know exactly how you feel about looking well but still suffering from the after effects of your treatment. I had radiotherapy in my pelvic area a couple of years ago and I still need to be within range of a loo at short notice. I am also on androgen deprivation therapy which keeps my cancer under control but has side effects which include loss of energy, fatigue and anxiety. My friends and family tend to forget this and I often have to remind them that I am not as strong and fit as I look or as I was a couple of years ago.

    It is really fantastic to know that you are cancer free andI hope you will keep in touch.

    Rob x

  • LesleyLesley Posts: 155 ✭✭✭

    Hello , Marie,

    You have lots of support from people here that you will most probably never meet,but, they will become your best friends, never judge you ,always support you, be with you every step of the way! We will laugh with you and cry with you! We are just here! Xx

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