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I’ve lost my libido

Since being diagnosed 5 years ago my sex drive with my now husband has gone. I see him as a carer now.


  • RobertARobertA Posts: 1,272 ✭✭✭✭✭
    Hi @carol19564

    Firstly, welcome to our community. We are a friendly and growing group and very supportive of each other. 

    I have an advanced and incurable prostate cancer. Prostate cancer thrives on testosterone and so my treatment involves the removal of all of the testosterone in my body which is effectively chemical castration. It holds the cancer back for a while, (quite a while I hope) but it has made me impotent and I have no libido either.  I knew that this would happen and I wondered how it would impact on my marriage.  It did not. 
    Our feelings for each other have not changed and we still enjoy hugs and cuddles, go out for meals and have great holidays and long walks.
    The libido issue is not the most important thing in the world for us but if you are both unhappy with the situation, you could have a chat with your local MacMillans. They are experienced in all cancer related issues and may be able to offer a counsellor who is a specialist in the subject.

    Do keep in touch.

    Rob x 

  • SunshinedaffSunshinedaff Posts: 1,410 ✭✭✭✭✭
    @carol19564 @RobertA

    Hi Carol and Rob, 

    I think your comments are so honest and helpful Rob. 

    Carol, so much changes when we have to embark on treatment for cancer that has far-reaching impact on other areas of our lives. I know it may be of little comfort but this happens to so many people.
     But one thing is I know, not to feel guilty about the change. That has been out of your control. 
    I agree with Rob, if this is causing you much unhappiness in your marriage, finding a professional to talk to would be helpful. I am sure they would be able to help you, and provide some support.

    Welcome to the group Carol, thank you for being so open, glad to have you here.

    Lou x

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